Remembering Where I've Been

13 But they soon forgot his works; they did not wait for his counsel.  14 But they had a wanton craving in the wilderness, and put God to the test in the desert; 15 he gave them what they asked, but sent a wasting disease among them. ----- Psalm 106:13 - 15

 

What happens when we forget to look to God, and instead fill up with other things?

When I neglect the relationship--when I decide I don't have time to read Scripture or seek my Father in prayer--it becomes easier for me to forget the great things that God has done in my life. When I choose to give myself to activities of distraction (shopping, eating) or of modern life (watching television, time on the computer) instead of giving that time to God, I put Him at a convenient distance. It's like I say, I'll deal with Him some other time, sometime soon when I feel up to it. When I put the relationship on hold for other things, God is not my centerpoint. And those wonderful experiences of Him stepping into my life become nostalgic memories.

It becomes easier to go ahead with my own plans when I neglect the relationship. And when my plans don't work out, how easy it is to then go to God and tell Him how I expect Him to make the situation work for me. God does sometimes give me what I want. And how often do I then get MORE than I've asked for...more headaches, more disappointment, more frustration...?

When I'm giving to the relationship--spending time in God's Word, praying, putting the relationship into action--that is when I remember. How easily I recall that Christ wooed me, calling me out of the darkness of self-hatred, healing the deep wounds, assuring me that I am His beloved. I remember where I was...and see so clearly where I am today. When I remember where I was, when I take stock of where I am today compared to those dark days not so very long ago, why would I ever choose to go off without Him?

Well, maybe it's not a choice. Perhaps it's simply the outcome of neglecting the relationship. Because when I am consciously aware of what once was, I immediately give God thanks! Remembering the past brings the automatic, I-can't-help-myself love response of praise. And with that, I'm attending to the relationship.

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